Sticking with the diet.

So far so good. Sticking to weight watchers without being fat, and without the extra nursing points takes planning. I pretty much know what I will eat for the rest of the day with 2 points left over for a night snack.

I have not been able to weigh in at all. My husband has been working long hours, and I really enjoy the meetings. I also am procrastinating. The more I lose without knowing the less I will beat up on myself. So if I weigh in and still am in the 180's I will be thrilled.

I haven't been able to get back into the working out aspect. It is hard without the marathon as my goal I feel blah about it. I am going to do a duathalon. Even that though seems almost easy in comparison. It is a 3k run, 12 mile bike, and then a 5k run. Just seems so anticlimactic after the half marathon.

So I never told the story of the half marathon. Well here it is a month late but better late than never.

So May 29th I went and picked up my packet, I never felt better here I was showing up to an event with all these people I envied previously and now I was one of them. I received my packet and my husband went out for a pasta dinner. Then my wonderful husband took me to Dick's and let me buy a running outfit. I have always run in pants and whatever t-shirt I could find. It was going to be unseasonably warm so he insisted I needed shorts. I ended up picking out a running skirt, and a sleeveless tight shirt. I thought I looked great...at the store.

Later that night I put on my new outfit to show my husband. He looked at me and lost it, I realised I am NOTHING like the other people picking up the packets, I looked like a cow in the outfit. I yelled at Ryan, I cried, and threatened to not run the next day. I was just really nervous about the race, and took it out on poor Ryan.

The next day I woke up still upset about how fat I thought I would look, but still got dressed, picked up my friends, and went off to the race. We lined up took off, and around 1 mile down we all separated at our own pace. I was doing good till I hit 3 miles, and wanted to cry, I could have sworn to myself that I just ran 5 miles. Thankfully the next 2 miles were all lake front, and I was able to enjoy the scenery. Right at mile 5 I saw my husband cheering me on. Ironically mile 5 the reverse way is also mile 10, I was doing a decent pace, the clock showed 57 minutes, not bad figuring that I was from start not from when I finally crossed the starting line.

I became pretty motivated at that time, I was under the 12 minute pace I wanted for myself. I saw my husband. Mile 5-10 went awesome, I was still running about mile 7 I ran into the 12 minute pacer. He was an older nice man who this was his 132nd half marathon, he also had run 52 full marathons. So I started running with him and 2 other ladies. We had fun we were encouraging and enjoying ourselves.

Then I passed the mile 10 marker.....I asked the pacer where we were and he said we were a little behind pace it was at 2 hours and 5 minutes. I was okay with that...and then BAM!!!!!!!!

I hit the wall, the idea of running anymore had me in tears, I started to just walk, when one of my new friends tried to encourage me I had images of punching her in the nose. I slowed down to a near crawl. The only thing that kept me going was pure fact that I would not be the one that gave up after 10 miles. If I had to crawl across that finish line I would do it. So I kept going, slowly and walking. Mile 12 came and there was my husband in running shoes. He kept lying to me saying it was just around the corner not long, I would try to run but my toe (of all things) would cramp up and I would lose my balance. So I just stuck to walking. Just I hit the strip where the end was I hear "MOMMY GO MOMMY" look over and there are my darling girls cheering me on like I was going to win the race. So toe be damned I was going to run across that line. I started running like it was the first mile, I ran over gave them hugs on the run, and ran across that finish line at 3 hours 2 minutes and 15 seconds.

I was finished 2427th(out of 2583)....but when I went over to meet my Riley with my finishing medal, she ran up to me gave me a big hug and said "YOU WON MOMMY, You WON!!!!!!!!"

So that was the race, it took me an hour to go 3 miles, and 2 hours to go 10. I think I needed to work on endurance a little more. I figure I can only get better, I can't get much worse. After I know I get the half marathons down I will start to prepare for a full. But I have to be able to do it in less than 5 hours.

I am back

It has been awhile. I have been taking a break from the weight loss, I gained some. I don't know how much but my size 8 jeans are too tight, and the size 10's are still falling off but were not embarrassing anymore. I will go to weight watchers again tomorrow, and will soon know the true extent of damage I have done. I am a little nervous about it.

I have spent the last 2 months not tracking, but I can not say I am eating horrible just just not watching. I also won't say I regret everything I did. I enjoyed this little break, this time where eating, counting and exercising controlled my life. I ate what I wanted when I wanted, but always with the mindset of still eating right. I never bought Oreo's and ate the entire bag, I never ate big Mac's and french fries. I still loved my Moe's and kept away from adding high caloric things like loads of cheese, sour cream, and eating it with the tortilla.

I did eat pizza now and then, would let myself have cake at birthdays, and eat buns, real ones not Arnold's thins. I just let myself eat when hungry and stop when I was not. Stuff I will get to do when I am at the end of the weight loss journey....not in the middle.

The one part I did disappoint myself with was the fact I stopped exercising, sure I have my excuse of working more, but that is an excuse. I made 2 YMCA reservations this week, so I can jump back on that wagon.

I started up the weight watcher web site and tracked everything for today. I am drinking water and trying not to cry to myself about the loss of nursing points. I have 19 points less than I had when I started weight watchers. It almost makes me wish I could be a wet nurse and NEVER stop nursing.

I do have a ton more to tell you but that is a start. I will end with 2 pictures. One is From Sophie's first birthday and the other is from my older daughter's first birthday. It still amazes me to look at the difference. Sophie turned 1 on June 23rd 2010. Riley's is from February 27th 2008.