working out.

I am taking an easy still. I am doing 30 minute walks, while Riley has her gymnastics class. Maybe there is something wrong with me but unless I am sweating and breathing hard I do not feel that it was productive, and a 30 minute walk does not even come close.

IT makes me think back to what I used to consider "working out" I would walk up the street and back down, about 1.2 miles, and congratulate myself on that, then follow it up with a treat of some kind. I used to love to take the .5 mile walk to the gas station by our house, to go get candy, chocolate, or ice cream, the walk the .5 mile back, and eat about 400 calories in snacks. I would walk around the mall for a couple of hours, and follow it up with a trip to Mrs. Fields. They had the buy 3 items get the fourth free, I would eat 2 right away, bring home the other 2, one for me and one for my husband. I always rewarded my measly exercises with a something bad for me.

I will say I was lucky, Even at my fattest I was able to stay some what fit. I never had knee problems, or back problems. Sure after a long walk my feet would ache but I just thought that everyone felt that way. So when I started actually working out I was able to push myself. I was pretty certain that I could run the 13.1 miles in 2 hours and 15 minutes. Now with the slight set back I am going to up that to 2 hours and 30 minutes.

My entire out look on working out has changed, I love to push myself see how much I can do. I think that is why I chose running, it is something I can see every time I run, I can go faster and farther than ever before.

I love that certain things have changed in my life forever, I can never see eating the way I used to ever again. I also can never see me wanting to not work out, sure I will slack ow and then but these past couple of weeks have proven to myself that it is an important part of my life. I miss it so much!

YAY! 183.8

Loosing a gall bladder was nice to me. I am down 6 pounds! Now my goal is to just keep that this week. I really have to watch what I eat, because exercise is slow, today I walked for 30 minutes on the treadmill, and earned a measly 2 points, better than nothing but still not my 40-60 minute runs.

So goal this week is to maintain the loss from surgery, if I lose great, but it will not ruin anything. Next week I hope that I get the okay from my doctor to run again. It kills me though, today is a gorgeous 55 degree day, and I could not run.

So I start my week at 183.8...68 pounds lost since August 11Th.

Holy pregnancy!!

Note to self DO NOT DRINK THE BLOG WATER!!!

Okay just doing my daily reading (I needed to do 2 weeks of catch up) and read 3 of my blogger friends announced they are pregnant!


Congrats to Learning to be less, Jenn at Watch my Butt Shrink, and Laura at Monday Starts today!

Feeling better everyday!

I am scared right now. I am healing a little everyday, I had the laparoscopy surgery done, so I should be back to 95% in 2 weeks. My surgon said I will be able to do everything in 4 weeks.

That is 4 weeks off from strength training, I hope to be okay to run in another week. I do not like this in fact I am getting panic attacks, because lack of working out. I think part of me thinks I will wake up and be 250 pounds again. Everytime I look in the mirror I think I see weight I am gaining.

Tomorrow I have my weigh in, last week I missed it because of an attack. It is hard for me to even guess what the scale will say, I could have lost 10 pounds or gained 5 I guess I will know tomorrow.

The only thing that totally keeps me from freaking out is the less of an appitite I am having right now. It is coming back slowly now but until yesterday I had not one complete meal.

So I will let you all know about tomorrow...Oh one thing I forgot to tell blog world, I own a pair of size 8 jeans.....that fit!!!!

I am back... minus a gall bladder.

I am back.

The past month or so I had these really intese stomach pains, I chalked it up to a stomach ulcer or bad heart burn. Long story short, it turns out I had gall stones. I went to the ER tuesday night with horrible pains and left the hospital yesterday without my gall bladder.

Bad news is that obviously excersising is taking a back seat to healing.

Good news is I have zero appitite I eat only enough of what is good for me and not much more.