Coulda, woulda, shoulda...

I am feeling chatty this morning so forgive me, but something I said in my last post really got me thinking. I said I wished I would have started this journey when I weighed 200 pounds. Laura an online friend is starting hers at that point. If i could go back in time and do it all over again there are so many times I should have started this.

I started thinking back, about how when I graduated high school I was slightly overweight, not fat just a solid 10-12, if I would have just paid better attention to myself then, I could have dropped 25 pounds and been a nice 6-8 and kept at it and kept a healthy life style.

Then I went into AmeriCorps, I had all the tools then to lose weight. We could use the gym at the Air Force base, we made all our meals, I had people around me that were healthy eaters/ vegetarians, if I would have just started then 30-35 pounds I could have lost it in the 10 months and started a healthy lifestyle then.

When I was in college and living at my parents cottage on the lake. It was perfect exercise right outside my door, swimming, running, state parks for wonderful walks. Ski trails for Cross country skiing in the winter. It would have been a perfect time to lose the weight and start a healthy life style if only I woulda lost 40 pounds then.

Oh but then I started partying and lived with my friend Kris, she helped me stay in check and we would go exercise(dance at clubs)at least 3 nights a week, and our meals were mainly liquid, I lost 25 pounds! But then I grew up a little and instead of taking that bad weigh loss and running with it and turning my life around, I coulda just lost 15 more pounds the right way and had a healthy lifestyle then.

Okay so I moved in with my ex, It was great we lived in an apartment complex with its own gym, and pool. I shoulda lost weight then but no, I gained and gained. If I would have just caught myself early I coulda lost the weight the weight not gained and had 50 pounds to lose.

Then we broke up and I was in a bad relationship, not much detail but it was unhealthy and I matched that unhealthy bad time in my life with food, lots and lots of food. I put on a ton then. Then that guy was out of my life YAY, time to turn it around and lose weight, and I actually did, then I met the best thing to me, Ryan.

He is fit, healthy and perfect, what did I do. We ate out all the time, and when I would cook it was unhealthy and we both ate, and we both gained. When Ryan realized he gained 25 pounds what did he do, he lost it, ate healthy, worked out, and was back to normal in 2 months, what did I do? Talk....talk about how I was going to diet, work out, and all that junk, plan days when I would start, but never did.

Then at 220 I got pregnant with Riley, so now I shoulda ate healthy, for that pregnancy focus on not gaining too much weight, but I didn't I ate whatever I want and I ate huge amounts. So then I was 260 giving birth, lost 20 pounds. I did diet for a month and lost 10 more pounds but I shoulda kept going but didn't, and I gainedthe 10 pouns back. If only I woulda paid attention then I coulda been a healthy weight when I got pregnant again.

So when I got pregnant with Sophie I was 240. I did watch myself a little more this time. I "only" gained 30 pounds this time around. Six weeks after birth I lost 20 pounds and started my journey at 251. Oh how I wish I woulda, coulda, shoulda started before.

my next post I will write about why I am bound and determined to win this time, also what my aha moment was. But I do want my readers to tell tell me one of 3 things....

1. If you have lost weight or are working on it, what was you wake up call or "aha" moment?

2. If you never have had to lose a huge amount, what do you do to stay healthy? also please tell me what is your way of staying healthy when temptation faces you?

3. If you feel the need to start a journey like mine what is holding you back from starting today?

Please share with me, you can post anonymous if you want.